X. Alevi-Bektashi Humor

Alevis and Bektashis love to use humor to mock religious legalism, hypocrisy, "and'those who they feel have persecuted them. This humor reveals much about Alevi-Bektashi thought. To understand their humor is to understand the Alevi-Bektashis' approach to life, religion, and their place in society. Here are only a few examples of the hundreds of Bektashi jokes (fikralar) that have been collected.

This first joke reflects the Alevi attitude toward the legalism of the five pillars.

The pillars of Islam

A religious fanatic was debating with a Bektashi, and asked, "How many are the pillars of Islam?"

The Bektashi immediately answered, "One!"

The fundamentalist retorted, ''Look at that! You don't even know the pillars of Islam and yet you brag you're an expert dervish!"

"Be patient, and let me explain, 0 teacher," answered the Bektashi. "You see, I've noticed that you all don't go on the required pilgrimage and you all don't give the required alms to the poor. Well, we don't fast during Ramazan and we don't do the daily prayers. Between üs, what have we left of the five pillars except the confession of faith?"

As was mentioned above, Alevis do not observe the fasting month of Ramazan. Over the centuries, this has become the subject of many, many Bektashi jokes. In the following joke there is play on words. In Turkish, to not keep the fast, or to break the fast at the wrong time, is to literally "eat the fast" (oruçyemek).

The fast and the prayers

Some folks asked a Bektashi saint, "Which do you love the most: fasting, or doing the required prayers?"

Without hesitation, he answered, "I love the fast -because it can be eaten!"

Scores of Alevi-Bektashi jokes reflect the tension of their living under the rule of Muslim religious law in pre-Republican Turkey while non-Muslim minorities were exempt from certain restrictions. Alevis still tell jokes like the following two examples concerning Ramazan because they feel social pressures on them to conform continue to this day, even if religious law is not the law of the state.

Count your blessings

One day during Ramazan, an Alevi dede was caught eating and thrown in jail. While looking out through the bars of his cell, he saw a man eating a watermelon. He yelled to the man, "Hey, what are you doing? Don't you know it's Ramazan? Be careful, or you'll suffer the same fate as me!"

The man answered, "But I'm not a Muslim." Jealous of the man's freedom, the dede called out, "In that case, give a thousand thanks while you're eating!"

Look what it cost me

While walking by a Bektashi's house one day during Ramazan, a man saw through the window the Bektashi enjoying a fine meal. The Bektashi motioned for the man to come in. Unable to resist the Bektashi's hospitality, the man joined him. But when a policeman came by and saw them, he took them both to court. The judge heard the other man's case first, and because he had no good excuse, the judge gave him his penalty.

But the Bektashi was very sorry to see the man pay for his crime, feeling he had a part in it. When it was the Bektashi's turn to be questioned, the judge asked, "Why weren't you fasting?"

"I am a Christian, sir!" answered the Bektashi.

"Well, in that case, you are free to leave," said the judge.

"But I want to become a Muslim, sir," said the Bektashi.

The judge's eyes brightened. "That's wonderful!" he exclaimed.

The Bektashi continued. "But sir, before I become a Muslim I have one request. I'd like you to forgive and release my friend here."

The judge thought about this a minute. Figuring it was worth releasing the man to gain a Christian convert to Islam, he agreed.

Outside, the man thanked the Bektashi. But before 

they parted the Bektashi warned him, "Notice what happened. To save myself, I had to become a Christian. Then to save you, I had to become a Muslim. Next time be more careful. I don't want to have to work so hard again!"

The drinking of alcohol is not forbidden among Alevi-Bektashis. Many of their jokes feature this subject. Here is one example:

Wine and water

Due to the pressure of his friends, a Bektashi went with them to a mosque at Friday noon. During the sermon, the imam was describing in vivid detail all of the natural and religious reasons why drinking any alcohol at all is bad.

As an illustration, the imam said, "If you put a bucket of water and a bucket of wine in front of a donkey, which one will it drink? The water, of course. Now why would a donkey choose to drink the water and not the wine?"